Marvel is Crack. Or Maybe LSD.

LSD is the drug informally called “acid,” right? And supposedly if you “drop acid” seven times you qualify as legally insane? Or was it five times? I’ve heard both, and I’m pretty sure both are urban legends. You could always google it if you’re interested enough; I’m not; I’m just using it as a metaphor, here. Being a hardcore Marvelite sometimes makes me feel schizophrenic. Just last week, or the week before, or yesterday, I was lamenting how Marvel so shamelessly shills gimmickry. Cases in point: the “killing” of the Incredible Hulk, complete with mandatory miniseries, and the even more shameless pandering to the PC movement by forcing racial and other kinds of diversity down its fans’ throats, replacing Tony Stark as Iron Man with a teenage girl being the latest example. It’s enough to make a guy want to swear off comics for good.

Then I go and read the latest issue of CIVIL WAR 2, and it’s so damn GOOD. Even knowing it’s going to lead up to the removal of Tony Stark and the installation of Iron Teen as the newest flavor-of-the-month doesn’t keep me from enjoying it. Totally schizo, right? I love it, I hate it, I keep right on reading. I will NOT be reading the adventures of Iron Teen, though. Not even if they gave the books away. I may be tacitly supporting Marvel’s tokenism by reading CW2, but as Val Kilmer said in TOMBSTONE, my hypocrisy only goes so far.