ALL HAIL DOOM

Doom is a genius in physics, robotics, cybernetics, genetics, weapons technology, bio-chemistry, and time travel. He is also self-taught in the mystic arts. Doom is a natural leader, a brilliant strategist, and a sly deceiver.

Last week I pontificated on the abysmal failure of the latest FANTASTIC FOUR movie. Which reminded me of the two previous abysmal failures. All of which reminds me of the greatest transgression this slew of films has committed. No, not by casting Jessica Alba, who couldn’t ACT like she was in pain if you smashed her big toe with a hammer. No, not by making the Human Torch a black dude. No, not by depicting Galactus as a big puffy cloud with an attitude. The greatest disservice of which the FF movies are complicit is paid to Doctor Doom. And this is, I believe, the primary reason why they failed. You can’t cast Doom as a smarmy playboy or a whiny brat and expect it to fly. Screw the people in the blue suits, with the 4s on their chests. If Doom doesn’t work, the movie won’t work.

Doom is tied with the Joker, in my opinion, as the greatest villain in comics. That’s if he IS a villain. A good argument could be made that he is, in fact, a ruthless, megalomaniacal HERO. (After all, in the current SECRET WARS storyline, it was Doom, not the Avengers or any of the other Marvel heroes, who saved the Multiverse, sorta.) And how badass is the guy? He just KILLED THE FREAKIN’ DARK PHOENIX. You do NOT wanna mess with Dr. Doom. Which is why the makers of those asinine movies better be glad that Doom isn’t living in THIS universe.

source: marvel.com